Failure seems like the ultimate fear to teaching let alone when homeschooling and teaching your own children! There is something extremely intimidating about saying you want to teach your own children because then if they fail…it feels even more of a mirror on you and your ability as a teacher or even worse a parent. Not to mention…what if you can’t do it!??!
I think as a parent (and granted in the scheme of this I’m pretty new to the parenting game) but that if your child fails socially, can't recite their a-b-c’s or can't sit still (mind blowing but yes it happens) then it feels like you fail…but then to comfort yourself you could always blame the teachers or the school or those other kids who were just a terrible influence on them. We don’t want to but sometimes you just want to, to feel a little better.
But then you do the UnThiNKaBle you decide to homeschool. Now you’ve taken out a lot of the other scape goats and it’s left to you! What if I fail?
“Fail splendidly. Fail comfortably. Use failure as a redirect. Not a measure of your worth or value. Fail beautifully.” nayyirah waheed
So how do you face the possibility of failing as a mom + teacher — a “Mom-eacher” or a “Teach-om”??
Here are 3 ways to approach your fear of failure in teaching your kids:
- See the positive. Think about how great you will do in teaching your kids. It’s hard as you undertake something so overwhelming if you can’t see the positive in yourself. It’s the same in coming to the decision of homeschooling that it can’t be out of a negative place of fear as I described in my other post here. What has surprised me in my journey of homeschooling is how many other parents say “wow! I could never homeschool because I’m not smart enough!” (seriously this mom had two masters degrees!) or one mom said “I couldn’t teach my own kids!” (a certified teacher that has taught for a decade!) Even though I know homeschooling is not the right fit for everyone I do know our undermining ourselves before we start helps no one!
- Have a plan B. It’s not unheard of things for things to go wrong…and most likely things will go wrong in one way or another…and after you've reminded yourself why you are doing this as you figured out your why to homeschool. What could be a plan B for you? When I started I told myself that the worst case scenario was that we put them in school. That’s right..even though tragic as it might be because I desire so much from their education experience, it would not be the worst thing.
- Live boldly. There are things I don’t want to do …that sometimes I only attempt because I think “If my kids were in this situation, what advice would I give them.” One of my favorite things I tell my kids when they want to give up is “ we don’t give up.” That doesn’t mean keep trying something that doesn’t work but it does mean trying even if it’s hard. So as silly as it is that a dialogue is with my future children, it has become a motivator to live boldly as I decided to do some things that scare me. For example, Teach and blog!
So whether the veteran homeschool mom gives a air of unwavering confidence that is unmatched and it intimidates you, or your friend who is a teacher has made it clear that you are not qualified to teach OR if you just genuinely can’t see your abilities…I think there is a time to jump even though you have a fear.
And congratulations you’ve joined in with millions of others who still have that fear but decided to go for it anyways!
In the trenches,